by Jeff Veley | Apr 24, 2017 | Blog
The story of a teen using social media as her diary (heard in the audio clip above)
You may ask “Did she really think that no one saw her posts?” Believe it or not both teens and adults often post without first considering the consequences. Reminding ourselves to use an online filter is extremely important. Use this graphic to help you break this down with your kids.
Remember that in this digital age we all have an online reputation that can be easily accessed by potential employers, colleges/universities, and your average stranger. Every post with text, pictures, video, etc leaves a digital footprint. Nothing ever disappears. Even SnapChat’s messages, which ‘feel’ safer can be accessed later with a simple screenshot. SnapChat’s servers were once hacked and previously deleted images could be accessed. Even when you think it’s gone forever, your digital footprint has left an impression somewhere.
Love Always Protects
Jeff Veley leads a workshop for teens called “Becoming Cyber-Smart”. It teaches teens how to respond to digital drama and prevent problems online such as cyber-bullying, textual harassment, and sexting. For more information, contact us.
by Jeff Veley | Apr 17, 2017 | Articles/Interviews
Gary, Indiana — Jeff Veley was one of several experts invited to attend World Civility Day, organized by Community Civility Counts,. Veley shared how to better promote civility and peace within educational institutions by empowering students and improving bullying prevention efforts.
Throughout the day, attendees had a chance to hear from Gary Chamber Commerce President, Dr. Charles Hughes and Dr. Gordon Bradshaw, Head of the Public Policy Department, who organized World Civility Day in partnership with the NWI Times. Additional presentations included the Indiana State Police, the National Civility Center, and Lew Bayer of Civility Experts of Canada. The day closed with an evening gala featuring a special address by World Peace Ambassador and World Civility Spokesperson Dr. Clyde Rivers as well as a keynote speech from Indiana Attorney General Curtis Hill.
Jeff Veley meets with Dr. Louise Chickie Wolfe and students who were honored for their community service project and bullying prevention efforts.
“I commend the Indiana Chamber of Commerce and the NWI Times for the great work that they are doing to promote civility. This conversation started in Gary is reaching ears around the world.” Veley said, “Creating dialogue around this topic is key at this time and I’m thankful for the work that these organizations are doing to initiate these conversations.”
Ambassador Veley is the Chief Representative for the Campus Peace-Building Initiative, an initiative focused at promoting peace and harmony in schools through through resilience education for bullying prevention. He was honored with a World Civility International Award from Ambassador Dr. Clyde Rivers for his efforts in helping schools solve the bullying problem.
“It is an honor to receive this award and be commissioned as a World Civility Ambassador. We can all agree that civility is important but we tend to forget this when we are put down by someone else,” says Veley. Building resilience is one of the best ways that we can keep our emotions in line when we face conflict. It is the first step to seeking a peaceful and civil resolution”.
Jeff Veley is a national speaker, social skills educator, and entertainer specializing in resilience education for bullying prevention. His mission is to equip students with the social and emotional skills that empower them to face adversity, grow in resilience, and solve their own social problems. Jeff’s message has reached over one million people. He’s received the Golden Rule International Award, the World Civility International Award, recognized by the United Nations for effectiveness in teaching conflict resolution skills.
The Campus Peace-Building Initiative provides programs and resources for educational institutions, youth development organizations, and individuals that are working to make our schools places of peace and harmony. The initiative is a non-religious, non-political effort governed by the Golden Rule – the simple yet transformational skill that solves social conflicts, promotes civility, and facilitates peace.
Learn more about World Civility Day.
by Jeff Veley | Apr 4, 2017 | Articles/Interviews
Above: Jeff Veley hops in the classroom for a lesson on how to keep kids safe online and respond to haters when they pop up.
Research indicates that nearly 75% of teens are cyberbullied but only 1 in 10 tell their parents or other adults.
Since cyberbullying is something that most teens encounter, it’s important that we prepare them to deal with difficult, hurtful, and hateful people online. Here are some tips from youth speaker and bullying expert Jeff Veley on how you can best prepare your child for what they may encounter online. 
1. Ask yourself if it is more/less beneficial for your teen to have a certain social media account. Don’t cave because “it’s the cool thing to do”. Make sure that your decision is rooted in your child’s best interest.
2. Have a conversation about your expectations online and write a contract together… What’s appropriate? What isn’t? What’s an acceptable amount of time online? Can your child connect with someone they haven’t met in person or someone that you don’t know? Writing a social media contract together insures that both you and your teen are clear on expectations.
3. Engage in ongoing supervision of these accounts. Remember that your teen may have accounts that are not visible to you. They may also add additional accounts/apps on their computer or smart phone over time, so it’s important to check back frequently. You may find it helpful to use a parental supervision program like “Truth Locker” or “Zabra” to help you monitor your teens’ online conversations and texts.
4. Prepare a response to cyberbullying before it happens. Create some scenarios with your teen and rehearse appropriate responses with them. The best way to respond to someone that is being difficult, hurtful, or hateful online is to stay calm and be kind to that person. The person that is bullying wants your teen to get upset and react like a victim. If they don’t get upset the bully often loses interest and moves on. Responding with unkind words or embarrassing the aggressor only fuels their anger and escalates the situation. Instead of responding with hate, teach your teen to respond in love by staying calm and treating the other person like a friend. They will quickly see that it takes away the aggressors’ power and makes it more likely that others will step up and tell the bully to stop
5. Use inappropriate posts as conversation starters with your teen about the consequences making poor choices online. Every post contains a teachable moment. Most of all, don’t overreact when you see something inappropriate! Staying calm will help your teen feel more comfortable coming to you in the future. Cyberbullying is an incredible opportunity for you to teach your teen how to respond to negative people/comments using your family values. In addition, it presents a unique moment for your teen to practice appropriate social skills and build resiliency. Help them form their response and coach them through the situation.
6. While it’s best to respond in love (using the Golden Rule) in most situations, there are also times that teens must set a clear boundary and make a report, especially if someone is in danger or being threatened. Often teens feel guilty if they “unfriend”, “block”, or “report” someone online because they are afraid of the backlash that could happen when they set a boundary. Make sure that they understand that it isn’t rude to set a boundary with someone that repeatedly mistreats them. This will help your child know that they have the right to set standards in relationships regarding how they are treated and who they are willing to interact with.
Source: Jaana Jovonen, PhD, “Extending the School Grounds? – Bullying Experiences in Cyberspace”, The Journal of School Health, 2008
